HomeSlice

Sophia’s birthday party was today, and since history repeats itself, they destroyed the Yeager house, inside and out.  It’s a wonder we get invited anywhere - my kids are like the neighborhood hellions, teaching the younger kids lots of things like sass and what NOT to do at a birthday party. 

Sophia had a great time.  I got some fun pictures and a video of them bouncing in the moon bounce.  The kids ran around like maniacs.  Arden nearly plowed over numerous people while doing marathon circles with Sophia’s wagon, and Lily taught everyone a new fun game they can play with their butts bottoms - called “pop the balloons in the moon bounce”.  It basically wasn’t complicated - you simply take all the balloons you can and drop yourself as hard as possible on top of them until they pop.  Aside from making a lot of noise, and leaving blown up balloon intestines everywhere, it also terrorized poor Ava who would only go into the moon bounce after Lily promised no more exploding rubber. 

During cake eating, Arden fell off her seat and threw big chunks of cake into the air.  Lily dumped a bucket of block things out, then tripped and fell over them (I later made her clean them up).  There are some great pictures of Lily sulking when she couldn’t get a seat near Sophia during cake time, and one of Arden after she was a sweaty head in the moonbounce.  But my all-time favorite is this little video from the moonbounce.  If you listen carefully, you can hear Sara (Sophia’s cousin) telling Arden and Lily to be careful of baby Jack.  Arden says, very snottily, “YES WE KNOW!  WE’VE SEEN A BABY BEFORE!!!!” She’s like 3 going on 15. 

Another exciting moment was when Helen told us she was expecting again. As her husband Dave watched Lily and Arden duking it out in the ‘bounce, he said to Mike, “Wow, Arden doesn’t really back down from her big sister, does she?” Mike just laughed.  You could see the wheels in Dave’s head turning.  Helen thinks she’s having another girl.  If she does - good luck with all that estrogen!!

Oh, and by the way, if you are Flickr challenged like my mother:  when you view the pictures as a slideshow, and you place your mouse over the center of the pictures, a large “i” shows up (that’s short for “information").  Click the “i” and the titles of the pictures will come up.

I forgot to write about the conversation Mike had with the girls before we went to Asheville. 

First, I have to explain that the girls received Heidi - the animated, cheesy DVD version from my parents. They LOVE the movie. They love the freakish-looking Heidi and her whiny voice. They love the pretty blonde girl in the wheelchair, and they always clap their hands when the evil Aunt of Heidi is foiled in the end.  They love all the animals, especially Silky, the goat.  In fact, the girls like to pretend they are Silky the goat by baa-ing and crawling on the floor, kicking out their back legs.  Now that we have that explained, Mike was telling Lily and Arden that we were going to the mountains and they would be staying with Cristin in Durham. 

Lily got all misty-eyed and dreamy and was imagining outloud what it would be like where we were going.  In her best grammy impersonation, she said, “Oh, Daddy - that sounds absolutely beautiful!!! Is it like the mountains in Heidi?”

At which point Arden, lips in full pout, arms crossed, shouts out, “Will dere be goats dere?”

And that, dear friends, explains the difference in personalities between Lily and Arden. 

Mike took that stupid quiz where I scored a 2.  A TWO, people.  Mike of course got this result:

139 As a 1930s husband, I am Very Superior Take the test!

Dick. He was even a good husband in 1930’s standards.  DAMMIT!

Seriously, I’ve been shipping for 3 hours straight.  I’m taking a break, dammit.  I saw this fun Couples Survey on Leaner’s blog and stole it.  If you decide to play along, link me in the comments - I love this stuff!

Couples Survey

[1] What are your middle names? Peter and Kimler.  My middle name used to be Claudine, and I always hated it, so when we got married I took my maiden name as my middle name. 
[2] How long have you been together? We met in September of 1998, right after I moved to Richmond.
[3] How long did you know each other before you started dating? Well, we met on a blindish-sorta-date, so I guess we didn’t know each other at all. I will say that it didn’t feel “datey” until about the third one.
[4] Who asked whom out? Neither. A mutual friend told him to show me around the city when I moved to Richmond, and he said he would. 
[5] How old are each of you? Ugh.  I am 37.  He is 38.  Older and wiser. 
[6] What are your astrological signs? Double Trouble Taurus.  I remember reading a compatibility study on Tauruses marrying Tauruses. It said that the bulls like to be comfortable and surrounded by beauty, and if they can avoid getting fat together on the couch, all will be good. That hits just a tad too close to home. 
[7] When was your first kiss? Our third date. Silent Art Auction at the Jefferson Hotel, where we later married.  I was tired of waiting, so I grabbed him and planted a chaste little kiss on his lips. 
[8] Who’s mother do you see the most? Mine.  His mother passed away a couple of years ago. 
[9]Who’s father? Mine.  His dad lives in North Carolina. 
[10] Do you have any children together? Duh.  Yeah.  Two girls. 
[11] What about pets? Delilah - genetically a dog, more like a rabbit or mole in temperment. 
[12] Do you have a song? Many.  City of Blinding Lights by U2 always reminds me of him.  We Belong Together by Lenny Kravitz as well. 
[13] Which bill is the hardest on you as a couple? The mortgage. It is WAY U.G.L.Y.
[14] Who pays the bills? I do, but with his money.  Other than my charm and good lucks I contribute close to zero on the financial front. 
[15] Who drives and who sits shotgun? It’s half and half. 
[16] Did you go to the same school? Nope. But we did live in Raleigh, NC one year apart - and had a mutual friend.  Weird, no?
[17] Are you from the same hometown? No.
[18] Do you live in the same town now? Thank god, yes. I hate long distance relationships.
[19] Who is the smartest? Mike is a brainiac.  When it comes to common sense, though, I have to claim victory. 
[20] Who is the most sensitive? Yeah, that would be me.
[21] Where do you eat out at most as a couple? Small, non-chain restaurants in the Fan of Richmond. Really, any place that doesn’t give you crayons when you sit down is a good thing. 
[22] Where do you shop the most as a couple? Target. 
[23] Where is the furthest you have traveled as a couple? Colorado, skiing. 
[24] Who has the best group of friends? Me.  Mike isn’t much into hanging out with guys. 
[25] Who has the craziest exes? Yeah, me again.  Hands down.  And more than one crazy ex. 
[26] Who has the worst temper? Mine is more frequent, but man, when he is angry, watch out, world.  Scary stuff. 
[27] Who does the cooking? We both do. He’s a good cook and more creative than I am. 
[28] Who is more social? See question 24.  That would be me. 
[29] Who is the neat-freak? Him.  Which is scary because I’m pretty neat.  He makes me look like a slob.  He’s a neat freak, but things don’t have to be clean. I need things to be cleaned, but not necessarily neat.  This is why our house is generally in order. 
[30] Who is the most affectionate? It’s a toss up.  We’re both friendly with each other. 
[31] Who is the most stubborn? Hard question.  I would say him.  He can usually convince me to do something in his logical, lawyerly way.
[32] Who hogs the bed? Me. . . and he HATES it. 
[33] Who wakes up earlier? He does. 
[34] Where was your first date? In Shockoe Bottom, to some bars. 
[35] Who said I Love You first? He wrote it first, and I think I said it first. 
[36] Who has the bigger family? Brothers and sisters? Me definitely. Mexicans reproduce like crazy. 
[37] Do you give/get flowers often? Once or twice a year.  Both ways. 
[38] How do you spend the holidays? Mostly with my family since they live here.
[39] Do you have cute little names for each other? They are cute to us, but make others throw up in their mouths a little. 

Wow, I scored even lower on this little test of wifely-goodness than Kristin.  Yikes.  Of course, it’s based on 1930’s values - but still.  I suck. 

2 As a 1930s wife, I am Very Poor (Failure) Take the test!

Let’s face it, Cristina. It’s the peak of nap mat season and you are not going to have time to blog properly for at least the next two weeks. So I’ve given myself a free pass on blogger guilt.  Thanks to Kristin for nominating me as a Kick Ass Blogger (it was my first nomination, I was so touched!), but I can’t do anything with it other than thank her for it. 

So, a couple of blips.  Mike and I had a fabulous time in Asheville and it’s a good thing, because he won’t see me til the end of August and he returned to a swamped work schedule.  He and I both just stopped working - it’s 9.30 PM. I am going to treasure those two days alone with him for a while.  It was nice not thinking about work but man did it come back with a vengeance today. 

Additionally, I am mourning the loss of a family member.  My iRobot Scooba died last week, and I am finally able to talk about it.  I absolutely loathe mopping, and Mike bought me the Scooba because he knows how I feel about scrubbing floors.  The Scooba bit it last weekend and I nearly cried while on the phone with support.  They offered me a new top of the line model for a mere $300, since I’m a previous customer, but considering this robot only lasted for a year and a half I’m not really thrilled with the lifespan.  It is back to the old days with my FlipIt wet/dry vac.  I cursed the entire time I was running it over the floors. I also cursed at Delilah, who has shed her body weight in fur over the past month.  Molting freak. 

And then there’s Kindergarten. I’m trying not to think about it.  I can’t even believe it - that Lily will be off in a few short weeks.  I’ve turned into those mothers I made fun of.  Shouldn’t I be jumping for joy???  I’m SO not. 

Finally, I want you all to know that I took one of the hardest spin classes offered. It was a full 60 minutes with a maniac spin instructor, and not only did I not have a heart attack, but I managed to not fall off the bike.  Take THAT, spin class. 

I’m wiped out so here’s a basic rundown of the weekend:

a.) Cristin still wants kids after being with Lily and Arden for two days. She ran them around, swam with them, took them to the Children’s Museum, and generally catered to their whims.  They nearly burst into tears when we picked them up - they would have stayed forever. 

b.) We had our first “vacation” away from the girls in three years.  Sad, but very true.  So it was heavenly, not to mention the mountains near Asheville are one of my favorite places in the world.  Whenever I am there, I feel like I’m home, which is stupid because I was born and raised in Michigan.  Whatever.  It’s the way I feel.  I even priced out houses for when Mike retires.  I like to plan ahead. 

c.) I couldn’t get into the spa, which is a bit sad, but my own fault for not booking in advance.  That being said, I got to spend some much needed quality time with Mike and we did lots of fun things, like walking, shopping, and looking at landscaping - something we are both geeked out about.  We even got to see a smattering of street performers, something Richmond doesn’t cater to, including one particularly freaked-out fiddler who moved like Lord of the Dance on X and played like Willie Nelson.  Awesome!

And some pictures:

Although Cathy likes to pretend she’s antisocial and awkward, she’s really one of the sweetest and most thoughtful people.  The girls got a care-package from Cathy yesterday, and inside were 2 sets of these:

She also sent two awesome sets of sticker/stampy things.  The girls have been asking me over and over again what the different symbols mean - of course, I have no idea!  They are from Tokyo and I don’t speak “Tokyo”, as they call it. 

The chopsticks are awesome (yes, Cathy, I practiced with them so as to avoid a repeat of my Nobu experience) and the girls have been eating everything they can with them. Tonight, they drove Mike crazy by trying to eat Jell-O with them.  I explained that even people in Tokyo eat Jell-O with a spoon (do people in Tokyo eat Jell-O?  I highly doubt it, but it sounded good at the time).  They made quite a mess, but had a good time of it. 

The main problem I’ve had is trying to figure out how to get the chopsticks into their cool carrying cases. I’ve tried everything known to man but I can’t read the instructions (they are written in “Tokyo") and I’m not spatial and therefore cannot read the diagram. Oh well - one of these days Cathy will take pity on me and walk me through it over the phone.  Thanks Cathy - the care package was a big hit!

Today I got a wild hair up my butt and decided on a whim to take a Spin class. One of my favorite instructors, Kara, was teaching and her class was fairly empty (rare for Spin).  I asked her if I could crash because normally you need a reservation, and she said, in her usual perky way, “Sure, come on it!  It’ll be so FUN!”

First, I’m pretty intimidated by most of the classes I take at the Y.  I’m chunky but I’m cardiovascularly fit and I can do the advanced level classes fairly well for a 37 year old.  However, most of the people in the advanced classes are either 20ish or extremely model-like 30ish.  There are no people in those classes, normally, that look like they’ve pushed out two or three kiddies and eaten a few too many Blizzards at Dairy Queen.  Except for me.  Most of the regulars have forgotten I’m the one who fell during my first Cardio Box class when I lost my balance or when I rolled OFF the Ball during On the Ball class (is it mean that I was so vindicated when another chunky came to the class and fell off HER ball???). 

Second, Kara is totally ridiculous - in a good way.  She’s got some insane low body fat but she’s curvy and beautiful and she can seriously kick any guy’s butt that comes to her classes.  She’s always in a good mood, plays good music, and is patient with those of us who struggle to keep up but keep on coming back for punishment.  Between Kara’s insanely fit body and the insanely fit people who take her classes, I usually feel like a total freak or idiot anyway, but today was the topper.

Spin Class requires a lot of set up, and because I’d never taken a class before, I had no idea what settings to use on the bike. Kara helped me figure out where the handlebars, seat, and seat height should be, but within 10 seconds my butt was in agony from that very unpadded seat and I felt like I was falling forward into the handlebars.  I also had a lot of trouble getting my feet into those stupid stirrupy things on the pedals.  Kara got the music cranking (I was the only person in the class who correctly identified David Bowie’s “Modern Love” - go me!), and we started peddling. 

About 15 minutes in, I was tired but very proud that I was able to hold my own with the class. I still felt like the seat wasn’t right, so between songs I got off the bike and pushed it back.  Unfortunately when I did that, it made the seat tilt forward, like a slide pointing down toward my toes.  I didn’t have time to mess with it so I sucked it up and got back on the bike.  The pitch of the seat made the “resting” positions (i.e. seated spinning) feel horrible since all the weight was on my forearms to hold me from slipping off the bike.  During one of the sprints, we stood up in our pedals and went as fast as possible.  I apparently missed the tutorial where you are supposed to strap your feet into the stirrups tightly, and my right foot slipped halfway out of the pedal and lodged there.

This misfortune caused me to tilt scarily to the right while my right knee went up in the air and my left knee went out at a nearly 90 degree angle. Picture me like a dead spider crouched in the V of the bike trying frantically to get my feet free to so I could stand up and recover.  It didn’t work.  I ended up with my feet in the stirrups and my hands on the ground, and my butt in the air.  My right ankle is KILLING me now from the angle at which it was bent.  Let me tell you, that was some sexy manuevering.  I could hear the tanned ass next to me giggling.  When I splatted, I made a loud noise and I think I screamed “FALLING!” (apparently I thought I was rock climbing and not in Spin class), so Kara came over to me to try to release me.  Another 3 minutes and she had me, red-faced, back on the bike. 

I managed to finish out the class and stop blushing, but it was incredibly embarassing, especially when half the class wanted to know if I was okay and was this my first time.  Ya think?  Yep. First time. 

I thanked Kara on my way out. She asked me if I had fun, and I said enthusiastically, while trying to control the shake in my fried legs: “Oh, totally!  Can’t wait to do it again!  But next time I won’t disrupt class by falling off my bike.” I slunk out, my aura of uncoolness competing with the stench of my sweating body for victory.

What’s even more pitiful is that yes, I will do the class again.  Just like I went back to On the Ball and Cardio Box after my mishaps.  Unlike Prenatal Yoga, after my pooting incident. I can’t let my clutzy form keep me from getting fit.  I just wish there were more uncool and uncoordinated people at the Y. 

The Wondercat tagged me to do the Quirky Things Meme which means I have to list six quirky, yet totally mundane, things about my life. I’m not sure I can narrow my quirks down to just six, but I’ll give it a shot. 

The Rules
* Link to the person who tagged you.
* Mention the rules.
* Tell six quirky yet boring, unspectacular details about yourself.
* Tag six other bloggers by linking to them.
* Go to each person’s blog and leave a comment to let them know that they’ve been tagged.

My Six Quirky Things

1.  I don’t bite my nails, but if I break one, I’ll bite and pick at it until it’s angry and swollen.  It’s a real bummer, too. 

2.  I have an amazing aptitude for remembering weird conversations or things people said.  I regularly freak Jennifer out by remembering odd things, like the number of the pink embroidery thread we use on a particular nap mat. 

3.  I never fully recovered from my bout with Pica while pregnant with Arden.  Occasionally I still crave Ivory soap. 

4.  I cannot stand mayo unless it’s mixed with things, like deviled eggs or tuna salad. Even then, if I think about it too much, I start to gag. 

5.  Dirty countertops make me insane. I probably clean the kitchen counters 2-3 times a day.  I can’t stand crumbs or streaks.  My kitchen can be a mess, but the countertops have to be clean. 

6.  I am insanely good at Tetris. I love the game because it’s very ordered and neat-looking, unless I screw up. 

And I’m tagging the following people back:
Amanda
Lisa
Jae
Chantal - Breadcrumbs in the Butter
Leann - Momcast
Leaner

Kate was in charge of this week’s photo challenge.  The topic, and I quote: “Take a picture of a family member, friend, stranger, object etc. doing something that annoys the piss out of you.” If you decide to play along please link to your blog in the comments. I love looking at other people’s photos.  I’m a voyeur like that. 

Not hard to find around here!!!  Here are two pictures of the girls, and they will hate me for this later.  The first:  Arden sucking her thumb.  She STILL does it.  Note the smirk on her face that says, “Yeah, it’s my thumb. It’s in my mouth. Whatchagonnadoaboudit, eh???”

Then Lily, performing my all-time least favorite annoying thing.  No explanation is needed.

The top 5 reasons I’m cranky:

1.  I need more babysitting help.  Seriously. I am not going to survive nap mat season without more time in the office.  Can someone please save me?  Why do colleges start mid-August?  Do they not know that I dealing with nap mat season and it doesn’t end until SEPTEMBER?!?!?!  And that all my babysitters are college students? 

2.  Our SassyOnesies.com site’s order function is “broken”.  This means people can order, but I can’t do anything with the order - like process or ship it.  Yeah, that’s going to be nice.  3-5 days, says Yahoo Tech Support in terms of when they will get back to me.  In the meantime I’m on hold with Verizon Business trying to convince them it’s their problem and to fix it.

3.  I had my butt kicked from here to there in Super Circuit this morning, and I’m so sore I can barely sit down. 

4.  Arden and Lily have weird rashes. Lily has one on her back, Arden’s is on her chest.  When there is something unidentifiable on my children, I get cranky.

5.  4 hours a day is not enough time to get all the work done that needs to be done.  Wait, I think that relates to item 1.  Whatever. 

Help. 

My cousin Mike and his wife and baby (Anja and Mia) live nearby in Yorktown.  Well, it’s about an hour and half - if you don’t hit beach traffic.  Uncle Sal was in town getting his Mia-fix and they came up Friday night to visit us.  We had a great time.  I took a ton of pictures, as usual, and you can see all the fun in the Flickr Slideshow below.

Mia has gotten so big since I last saw her, and Lily and Arden are positively obsessed with her.  They were super excited that Mia walks now, and tried holding her hand while leading her all around the house.  I’m fairly certain Mia had had enough of their bossing her around by Saturday, but she was her usual good-natured sport and went along with their antics for the most part.

Mike couldn’t come up until Saturday since he had to take care of all the animals (5 cats and 2 dogs), so he arrived around noon.  We went to the pool in the morning, and Mom catered a delicious lunch for us at my house.  I think she believes I’m incapable of providing food for guests (she even brought her own jug of iced tea) but it was delicious.  Maybe one of these days I’ll be able to cook for my own house guests, but until then, I will enjoy eating her food. 

The girls enjoyed swimming together and Mia liked the water so much that her toes completely pruned up. There’s a great picture in the slideshow of her feet.  After lunch we went to Short Pump Mall to ride the train and have dinner before they headed back east.  Arden had become so attached to Mia and the rest that she was crying and didn’t stop until she went to bed, which of course made Anja start to cry.  It’s hard living away from family! Mike said he’d move if I would find him a job up here, so I’m on a mission. 

Today we’re taking it easy. We went to the pool this morning and will work with Lily on her bike riding (no training wheels) this afternoon. I also need to clean out my car - it is entirely nasty.  Old food, dirt, crumbs - it looks like a giant neon sign for rats saying “Hang out in me! I’m dirty and full of rotting food!!!! Come on it and eat!”